Communication
Q. Teachers have complained that my two children are argumentative and sometimes even disrespectful. When I ask the kids why they argued or were disrespectful, their response is that they didn't like the way the teacher talked to them, so that the reason they argue and their comments are being interpreted as disrespectful. How do I handle the teachers?
Q. Periodically someone says to me, “You’re weird.” What should I do or say?
Q. Recently a colleague and I were eating lunch and three times the individual answered the cell phone. Each time we were in the midst of a conversation and when each call was done, my colleague said, "Okay, where were we?" I think that's just plain rude and it makes lunch much less enjoyable. It's like I am not as important as the person who is calling, even though I am the one who is present.
Q. I heard a talk show that said children who are over-controlled and those who have little if any supervision often exhibit similar behaviors. That makes no sense whatsoever! What’s your opinion?
Q. I have a couple of “friends” who always seem in a rush. If we’re on the phone they are always in a hurry or must take another call or say, “I’ll phone you right back,” and then rarely do. I even found out they were actually in my part of town and didn’t bother to connect. Why do they act like that?
Q. I’ve watched you answering questions at your presentations and your style puzzles me. You replied with either the report of research data or gave your own brain’s opinion—and then went right on to the next question. You didn’t even try to convince the questioner to see things your way. Isn’t that a bit shortsighted?
Q. I asked a good friend if she wanted to help me put together a July 4th celebration, saying I had a nearby park in mind for the venue. She agreed. Now, just weeks away, she wants the celebration to be held in her back yard and I never had that in mind. I think she agreed to help with an ulterior motive in mind—to show off her new house! My brain wants to just tell her, “Thanks, but no thanks. I’ll do it on my own.”
Q. A colleague told me recently that I was “excessively biased” and I retorted that “my brain has no biases.” I’d be happy to report that you agree with me.
Q. I tested as having a fairly high IQ but routinely have difficulty communicating with most people. Do you have any suggestions?”
Q. I’ve heard you say that while “bias” (related to issues of safety) is innate, bigotry, racism, and prejudice are learned. Whatever do you mean by that?
Q. My boss tends to say "no" to most suggestions or requests I make. I've never thought of her as particularly negative or vindictive but this is getting ridiculous. I'm curious to know if you think this is a "brain thing."
Q. I keep hearing something about a "more effective way to talk to yourself," but I don't see what difference it makes. Can you help me understand?
