Emotional Intelligence

Q. You’re wrong about blame being unhelpful. As soon as I can pin the blame on someone, I can move on.

Q. Recently I broke up with someone I love very much—he could not or would not be monogamous. Furthermore, he couldn’t seem to understand the reason I found his behavior upsetting. He says that I’m the one he loves the most and the others are just for letting off steam. Even knowing our break-up was for the best, my heart is fractured and I can’t seem to get back on track. What’s wrong with my brain?

Q.  I’ve watched you answering questions at your presentations and your style puzzles me. You replied with either the report of research data or gave your own brain’s opinion—and then went right on to the next question. You didn’t even try to convince the questioner to see things your way. Isn’t that a bit shortsighted?

Q.  I perceive I’m being taken advantage of by a CEO and part-time romantic relationship who travels a lot. Recently I identified an untruth in one of our conversations. What type of a brain tells a bare-faced lie and expects to get away with it? And how do I deal with this? I really love this person.

Q. What does the term delayed gratification mean and how is it connected with EQ?

Q. Describe for me a person who consistently exhibits behaviors aligned with high levels of EQ.

Q. I have been working on raising my level of Emotional Intelligence and every small improvement seems to provide even bigger positive results in my life. I have several close friends who are not on that bandwagon with me. How do I get them to change?

Q. Give me one reason that I should care about my level of EQ!

Q. At times, I feel deluged with and surrounded by people who are hopeless. What can I do?

Q. I've heard about EQ (as opposed to IQ). Recently, however, I read an article that left me with the impression that EQ could not be quantified as can IQ and that EQ may not even be a real type of intelligence. What's your opinion?

Q. After listening to your presentation on EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient), I have been working on raising mine. It’s such an oxymoron: the more functional I become in my behaviors, the more quickly I seem to recognize dysfunctional behaviors around me, and I find that irritating. A year ago I wouldn’t even have noticed!

Q. Someone commented recently that I need to raise my EQ. Give me a break! What is this new jargon anyway?

Q. How can I motivate young people in my family to get aboard the “train of hope” during their youth?

Q. I recently heard a lecture purported to be about EQ but it was basically only about emotions. Is that really all Emotional Intelligence involves?

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